Mayday!

It's a good thing tonight was Atlanta Braves Safety Helmet Day for people sitting in the outfield. Thanks to Zach Day, they were getting peppered with line drives, homers, gappers, automatic doubles, foul balls, and anything else that could conceivably be forcibly directed towards the fans in the stands.

Substituting for the Braves' batting practice pitcher, Day stunk up the park, falling behind every hitter he faced. And, when your pitches would have a hard time bruising a hemophiliac, you can't afford to fall behind. He did. And he got ripped.

Congrats, Zach Day! You've won the Lame Duck Award!

Zach Day (File Photo) 

It would be nice if we could make at least one pitcher sweat this week. I think Mike Hampton threw 40 pitches through 7 innings... or so it seemed like it.

Ugh.

The people we should feel really sorry for are Charlie Slowes and Dave Shea, the radio broadcasters. They've had to burn through the majority of the year's blowout banter, and we're not even through the first fortnight! Christ, they were asking if each other bowled!?!?! I feel for ya guys. I know it's not easy.