Why Settle For 29th Best?
Hot off the MASN PR Bandwagon:
(WASHINGTON, DC) -- [Sadly,] Bob Carpenter will [tuck his tail between his legs and] return to the Washington Nationals’ television booth for the 2008 season [af if nothing had happened between them], MASN announced [to their disappointment] Thursday. The veteran broadcaster has been the television voice of the Nationals since the 2006 season and will return as the play-by-play announcer in 2008 [even though we tried dumping him and getting someone better and cheaper].
“I’m pleased to be back with MASN and [I suppose] the Nationals [because it beats being unemployed],” said Carpenter. “It’s an exciting time, with a new stadium, a team that’s getting better every year, and with the greatest fans in baseball [outside of St. Louis]. In only its first full year, MASN is doing a cutting edge production [such as Super Slo-Mo] and has one of the best talent teams in all of baseball [even with my return].
“I want to express my gratitude to all of the Nationals fans [and family members] who spoke out on my behalf. Without their support [and without the Nationals incompetence in hunting down a replacement], I’m not sure this would have happened.
“I am looking forward to being back with Don [even though he's stabbed me in the back] and Debbie [who's super hot in person] next year. My goal is to continue [or, perhaps, to even start] to give the Nationals' fans the best telecast in baseball,” Carpenter continued.