Friday, March 11, 2005

Welcome Back Kotter

The wonderful thing about Spring Training is that you can take a week off and not have missed anything. Did anything happen?

When we last left the juggernaut then were still busy being a juggernaut. But, what happens when you split a juggernaut in two? Apparently, it sinks. At least when it's facing an Indian (or nine) and a Marlin (or a shoal).

So, we won't sweep through the Grapefruit League. But, who really cares any way. The only flag that's going to matter is that NL East pennant that'll be flying over RFK at the end of the year! /Boswell

Tomo "Landlord-San" Ohka pitched well yesterday against Cleveland's Native Americans and earned himself a glowing headline in the Moontastic Times. Official Fat Pitcher of Distinguished Senators, ¡Livan! Hernandez pitched five innings, giving up only one earned run against the Nationals' true arch-nemesis, the scumbag-owned Sailfish. (Is there a team that's ever had a line of scummier owners? Wayne "No More Late Fees, My Ass" Huzienga, John "Not Steel Drivin', But Offshore Bankin'" Henry, and Jeffrey "Art Dealer/Partner Devaluer/Defrauder/Peanuts Enthusiast" Loria)

It appears that Francis(co) Beltran's elbow is shredded. It looks like he'll need reconstructive surgery, which'll probably hurt his chances of making the club out of spring training! The bright side, if there is one, is that 25 years ago, his career was over. Now, with some hard work, he can come back in a year or two and see what he has left. Luckily, youth is on his side.


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