Monday, April 21, 2008


C'mon. We're better than that. (Consider the source, I know)

I remember an episode of Iron Chef, when they brought the Iron Chefs to America for a few episodes. One of the shows featured one of the Iron Chefs going to a viewer's house to prepare a gourmet meal using nothing but the ingredients in the viewer's house.

This being a typical American house, the cupboard was full of Hamburger Helper, cans of Campbell's soup, and that can of pumpkin pie filling that's been sitting in the back of the cupboard for the last three years, only because you haven't dumped it off at the food pantry yet.

When the Iron Chef turned to the refrigerator, he was even more horrified. There was some milk, some cottage cheese, some brown lettuce, and that's about it. No fresh ingredients, nothing even resembling the raw materials a great chef can whip together, mixing ingredients in a way that make your taste buds tango.

I still remember the quizzical yet horrified look on his face when he realized that the show's producers were expecting him to produce something gourmet out scraps.

What he whipped together wasn't good. He winced when he tasted it. But it was probably (no, definitely) better than what you or I -- or the guy behind the stove at Chili's -- could whip together.

That's sorta the position Manny Acta's in. He can only do so much with the crap he's being given. And for at least half those nights, he's had to do it with fewer ingredients than most because the team won't shit or get off the pot with their DL moves.

Is he perfect? Probably not. But he's not the cause of the problem. He can only work with the Hamburger Helper and Ragu that Bowden, Kasten and Uncle Teddy have given him. Directing anger at him is anger focused in the wrong direction.

  • PS -- FIRE LENNY! (In his case, he's been given noodles, marinara, some capers and olives and managed to turn it into Spaghetti-Os)


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