Friday, December 21, 2007

All They Want For Christmas

Thanks to a mistaken BCC on an email from Mr. Kasten, I received a copy of the Nats' Secret Santa list, what our favorite Nats were asking for. Rather than hoard the info for my own devious purposes, I figured I'd share with you, my dear reader. If you're feeling charitable, I'm sure that any of these millionaires would appreciate you chipping in to brighten up their holiday.

Ryan Zimmerman: A first baseman who can field and Tiger Woods Golf for his Wii since his wrist won't let him play.

Austin Kearns: An HD Radio to listen to more Bluegrass Music and a Skyline Chili gift card.

Elijah Dukes: A new sidekick with an unlimited text and photo plan.

Lastings Milledge: A nifty new sweater vest

Ray King: A 72-ounce steak.

Paul Lo Duca: A gift subscription to the Racing Form, some Nationals Park stationary, and a new cellphone since his old one is TOAST.

Chad Cordero: A new baseball cap, and a trade for Khalil Greene.

Nook Logan: A shiny new bus for whichever minor league team he lands on.

Robert Fick: A shiny new bus for whichever minor league team he lands on, and a punching bag for his frustrations.

Ryan Church: Earplugs for the inevitable booing he's sure to receive for not being Lastings Milledge.

Matt Chico: Really high walls at Nationals Park.

Wily Mo Pena: Really short walls at Nationals Park.

Mike Bacsik: No walls at Nationals Park.

Joel Hanrahan: A copy of his favorite book.

Justin Maxwell: A new metering machine.

Tim Redding: A new trimmer.

John Patterson: A Jack LaLanne Power Juicer to help make healthier beverage alternatives in the clubhouse.

Dmitri Young: John Patterson's head on a stick.

Manny Acta: A new elbow for Shawn Hill.

Stan Kasten: Brisket that's reasonably priced.

Jim Bowden: A microphone and a mirror so he can practice at home since Stan won't let him do it in public.

Ted Lerner: Nothing listed. "Exchanging presents is a waste of money"


Post a Comment

<< Home