About Those Fatcats

If you saw the pictures floating around Teh Internets, you saw that the Nats made some big upgrades. No, we're not talking about our new rightfielder (either Guzman or Tavares), but to the Diamond Club. Supposedly, us plebes are supposed to be thrilled, living vicariously through the richies. So long as we know that they're dining and drinking in the lap of luxury, my overpriced, crappy seat in the outfield will be all the more magical. Or something like that.

Notably, the team spit out the talking point that they spent $2 million to upgrade the Diamond Club. (I'll pause here so you can take your hands off the keyboard, and do the 'big whoop' popping noise with your forefinger in your cheek.) Among the changes was the removal of bar that commemorated the last World Series championship the city saw way back in 1874 -- or something like that; i'm one of those stupid unappreciative carpetbaggers. In its place is something that looks eerily similar to something I saw at the Kansas City Hilton's "hip" bar. (Or maybe that was the Motel 6 in Paducah?)

At any rate, if you're a red-blooded Nats fan, you're probably contemplating what else that $2 million could've been spent on. (I'm sure you're envisioning a right fielder not named Tavares, for one.)

Why are they upgrading the richies so much? Well, cause they kinda have to. When the team opened the stadium, they forced people who wanted suites, boxes or some Diamond Club season tix to enter into a minimum 3-year contract. This would be the third year, and given how many of those boxes are empty, they need to do whatever they can to hold on to the base they have.

That motivation to upgrade the suites probably partially accounts for the Pudge and Marquis signings. Not only do they need to make these self-important morons feel even more self-importanter, they need to make these self-important morons think that we're a year away. If they can push the 2011 narrative, along with upgraded services, that's more renewals next year and more money for them to spend on the major-league payroll.

HAHAHAHAHA. Sorry. Got carried away there for a second.