Thursday, September 27, 2007

Tim Russert Is The Devil

You may have noticed the perpetually empty seats in the front row behind the Nats dugout the last few years. You may have also noticed on rare weekend days, they'd be occupied by a wild-haired, big-boned guy with the perpetual goofy smile of a drunk college student. How'd he get those prime seats -- sometimes alongside noted orc, James Carville? Easy, he's a celebrity -- wait, "celebrity" -- Nats fan.

I can live with that I guess. If there's one thing I've learned in DC, it's that people more famous than I deserve special treatment.

But hold on a minute. What's this? Tim Russert is hosting a debate -- a debate that's the height of masturbatory excess I might add parenthetically -- of the "candidates" for the President of "Red Sox Nation." Jesus, typing that makes me want to puke in Cordero's glove... At any rate, here's the key bit:
Russert, an avowed Red Sox fan, will swing by Boston after moderating the Democratic Presidential Debate in Hanover, NH on Wednesday evening.

"For decades, Boston has had a reputation of adoring its sports and its politics," said Larry Lucchino, the Red Sox' President/CEO. "We are honored that one of our top fans in Washington will moderate this discussion about baseball.

(Emphasis Added!)
Whiskey! Tango! Fox... eh... fuck it!

This pseudo-celebrity knobgobbler should immediately have his tickets taken away, kicked to the back of the curb and forcibly made to sit in a place where the hottest parts of the sun would bake his sorry Buffalo hide each and every time some crappo like Mike Bacsik pitches.

Stan Kasten, we look to you to do the right thing! Kick this wannabe Nats fan creepazoid out of the good seats, and put him in the back of the line with all the other fairweather idiots. You owe it to all of us who've suffered through two years of watching Ramon Ortiz, Pedro Astacio, Levalle Speigner and Joel Hanrahan pitch.


  • Here, here Chris. Dump Russert's ass.

    Also while we're on the subject, if i see one more flip-flop wearing, khaki cargo shorts and polo sporting college kid in the DC area walking around with one of those "broken in" (by the factory, of course) Red Sox hats, i'm gonna lose it. The Sox caps have apparently become "de rigueur" headwear for the greek system up and down the east coast. Please don't let this ever happen to the Nats. Although something tells me that when they start winning, suddenly everyone around here will have "always been a Nats fan."

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9/27/2007 8:32 PM  

  • i fucking HATE the stupid red sox and their absolutely insipid and retahded "fan base". the real fans are bad enough, always with the 'woe is me' ridiculousness that nothing ever good comes to us because we've got this goddamn curse, but yet we won the World Series but life still sucks cause we're from Boston and we're cursed. but these johnny-come-latelies with thier pre-broken in hats or the pink hats with the "YOUK" chants and Papelboner t-shirts.

    fuck Tim Russert.

    By Blogger Dave Nichols, at 9/27/2007 10:11 PM  

  • sorry. that was out of line.

    By Blogger Dave Nichols, at 9/27/2007 10:12 PM  

  • Come on Chris,
    This is DC! Did you think the best seats would go to somebody other than an out-of-town, high profile, money flashing, closet homosexual political figure???
    'course not.

    Russert does it with farm animals.

    By Blogger Rob B, at 9/27/2007 11:32 PM  

  • This is how I will know the seating in the new stadium was fixed. I had diamond club seats since 2005, and did not want to continue in them at the new stadium, so instead chose dugout box. Therefore, my prioirty SHOULD behigher than Russert's. If opening day he is in better seats than I am, the Nats once again prove they can not be trusted.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9/28/2007 8:04 AM  

  • You could fill two rows of seats with "avowed Nationals fans," you stupid flak. And any insult of me is an insult of Big Russ. Prepare for beatdown.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9/28/2007 9:23 AM  

  • and of course you recognize the fellow sitting two seats down from Tim right? James Carville showed up more often .. and of course George Wills in section 217 showed up [and would ride the metro home -- what a man of the people]

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9/28/2007 9:36 AM  

  • Save your whining, Needham. You wouldn't be complaining if Russert did this for the Yankees.


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9/28/2007 11:25 AM  

  • Or...maybe he is both a Red Sox fan AND a baseball fan and, like you, doesn't want to make the trip up to Baltimore to take in a game.

    Unless the Sox are playing up there.

    I guess that must be a crime or something. I think it's great that people want to come out and watch the games even if the Nats are not their most beloved team. And, it's even better that recognizeable personalities are seen around the park, as it increases the overall level of social acceptability of attending Nats games in particular and baseball games in general.

    Sheesh, calm down, Needham and commenters!

    By Blogger Brandon, at 9/29/2007 10:38 AM  

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